Marriage & Family : Stigma And Discrimination (Gender Dimension to HIV/AIDS). 3/11

Violence undermines the ability of women and girls to negotiate safe sex practices or to leave partners who are engaged in high risk behaviour

Gender based violence is widely acknowledged as a key risk factor for HIV/AIDS. Violence undermines the ability of women and girls to negotiate safe sex practices or to leave partners who are engaged in high risk behaviour. A study among women in antenatal clinics in South Africa found that women reporting violence were 505 more likely to be HIV positive.

Crying At Her Doorstep
Jay sat at the Mansion Doorstep and cried aloud. “Look at me, a living corpse. I am lonely, rejected, dejected, humiliated and isolated. What am I living for? My life is worthless. I cannot touch my son; I can no longer live with my husband as couple.” She lamented as she sobbed bitterly.

Tijan Comes Home
Tijan found Jay at their doorstep. “What are you doing here?” He barked.
“The househelp refused to open the door for me.” “Didn’t I tell you or did you not understand language? You cannot enter the mansion. We are Hiv neg while you are positive. I don’t want you infect my son with your diseased hands. Wait for me at your Quarters or better still ring me, you get my number if you need anything.” Tijan callously explained.
Jay quietly got up and headed for the Boys’ Quarters. She is shattered.

At Aziz’s House
Some police officers arrived with morose faces and asked for Aziz’s wife. Mam Kumba just came from the market and announced herself.
“Here I am! What is the problem? Is everything alright?”
“Madam! Your husband was involved in a fatal accident!” The officer announced. “What!” Mam Kumba fell on the ground. The officers were shocked. They applied first aid and helped revived her up.
“Madam! Are you okay? Gather yourself! Let us go to the Mortuary for you to help identify the corpse.” The officer ordered.
Mam Kumba was ushered into the car to go and identify her husband’s corpse. It was a sad moment.

Tijan Reflects On Jay’s Past Behaviour
Tijan announced to Jay about his six months Refresher Course. She became a bit apprehensive. “It’s okay. Time flies, within a short space of time you’ll see am here.” He said.

Tijan Comes Back
Tijan came back with flying colours. He is promoted to become the General Manager (GM) of his company.

Jay Changes Countenance
Jay is cool towards her husband when he needed her she gave him a sheath to wear. Tijan questioned her. “Are you not on family planning pills?” He asked.
“Yes, but I missed taking it and it can be dangerous. That’s why I insist on you putting on the sheath.” Jay argued.
“But I want another baby. Isn’t it what we agreed upon?” Tijan asked.
Jay was put in a corner but she was not sure about her status. She doesn’t want to infect her husband.

She Employs Another Tactic
When Tijan insisted to have intimacy with her she said. “ I am sick; another time sweetheart.”

Tijan Protests
“I cannot understand your behaviour since I came from my Refresher Course as you are avoiding me any time I need you, you refused my advances. What is it? Why are you avoiding me, don’t you want another child for me?” Tijan charged.
“No! No! Don’t say that Honey; it is not like that. It is only that my body is acting funny. I cannot understand it. I want to go to the doctor and have a thorough examination.” She said.
“Whatever! But you are no longer warm towards me.” Tijan posited.

Tijan Reflects
Tijan is ashamed and felt guilty of his treatment of Jay.
“Everyone makes mistake but my treatment of Jay is inhuman. Let me make amends before it is too late. I have already made a lot of blunder.”

Tijan Goes In Search of Jay
Tijan went to the Boys Quarters to apologize to Jay about his behaviour.
He knocked hard at the door but it was locked. He called Jay aloud but no answer. “What is happening? Is she in?” “Bang! Bang!” But still no reply. Tijan got a hammer and broke open the door. What did he see? Jay unconscious on the floor. Tijan exclaimed. “What! Oh no! You can’t do this to us. I am sorry! You cannot die Jay! You cannot! Hassum needs his mother.” He sobbed as he rushed Jay to hospital.

Jay Admits At The Intensive Care
Jay is admitted at the Intensive Care Unit. Tijan is heart broken. He was vindictive to punish his wife but he does not want her to die just to suffer for her infidelity.

At Hassan House
Absatou, Hassan wife discriminated against Aminata the narrator of the story. She poisoned Hassan’s mind against his sister.
“Our lives are in danger.” She told Hassan. “How?” Hassan asked. “Your sister goes to my kitchen and uses my utensils. She will infect them with her diseased hands. Let her keep away from my kitchen if there will be peace in this house.” Absatou posited.
“Aminata is my only kid sister. We are orphaned with two other brothers, Tijan and Salifu who stays aboard. She does not want to go back to the village. She came here for greener pastures. How can I send her away?” Hassan asked.
“I did not ask you to send her away; but said she should not enter my kitchen; period.” Absatou posited.

Hassan Confronts Aminata
“Do you want to destroy my marriage?” Hassan asked Aminata.
“How?” She innocently asked “What have I done?”
“My wife said you should not enter her kitchen or use her utensils. Why did you flout that?”
“I have given you enough money. Go to restaurants and eat there. I don’t what any trouble between you and my wife. You put yourself in your present state. Instead of going to school to learn you went after boys and men. Now you are infected with HIV and you want to destroy my home? I’ll not allow it.” Hassan lashed at Aminata.

Aminata Leaves
Aminata is dignified. She just packed her luggage and left Hassan’s house. Where was she to go? Tijan is hostile and has blamed Aminata for her status. Everywhere is blame, blame, and blame.

Hassan Reflects
“My wife is about to make me a father. I’ll not allow anyone to disturb that.” Hassan posited.

Jay At The Hospital
Tijan and Hassum went to the hospital to visit Jay. She was still in coma. Tijan prayed for her. He apologized. “Forgive me sweetheart. I was harsh to you. You are sick; I should have given you support and encouragement. HIV is a sickness anybody can get. Not only through intercourse but through blood transfusion or contaminated instruments. A Baby gets it through its mother. We should stop the name and shame. I have regretted my action. Please live to give me the chance to repent and change my ways. Our son needs his mother. I need back my wife. If you live, we will be as before, all compassing and loving. Please, don’t leave us darling, don’t.” Tijan sobbed.

A Sign Of Life
Jay shook her fingers. Tijan jumped and went to call Doctor Nabou.

Jay Asks For Forgiveness
Jay opened her mouth and feebly spoke to her son. “Hassum, my son, forgive me for my infidelity. I am sorry. Take care of yourself and always pray for me.” Then she turned around and died.

Hassum Shakes Jay
Hassum shook his mother. “Wake up mom! Wake up!” Hassum kept shaking his mom.

Tijan Comes Along With Doctor
Tijan came along with Doctor Nabou. She thoroughly checked her heart, her pulse and paused. Tijan shook her. “What is it Doctor? Jay shook her fingers. What is it? Are you not speaking?” “I am sorry!” Doctor said. “Sorry about what?” Tijan asked with agitation.
“We have lost her.” Doctor announced. “No! No! We can’t. I saw her shook her fingers. She cannot die and leave her small son behind. We need her. Allah is punishing my transgression. I have made amends. Don’t go Jay! Don’t go!” Tijan wept bitterly in shame and regret.
“I killed my wife! Stigma and Discrimination killed my wife.” He wept. The News devastated him but it was too late. Has he learned from his attitude?